So how did I get here?



 So how did I get here? Mid 30s divorced and childless living on my own for the first time ever? I guess we need to go back to the beginning…


Roll back to 18 year old me who finally, after living through secondary school pining over the chubby blonde boy and finally kissed him at the sixth form party. It only took 6 year, lots of alcohol, borrowed shoes from my sister, some hair straighteners and a very little blue dress that allowed the stars to align and all my teenage dreams to come true. Well actually no! 2 days later I flew to Europe for the summer as I normally did to stay with family and wishing I was in dreary rainy UK. Messages were swapped while I was away and I was sure nothing would ever come of it. I’d spent probably about 20 hours a week with this boy and we didn’t manage to get together so how the hell was it going to happen when our paths went separate ways. I went to university across London and he went to work. It was clearly doomed from the start.


Until a very drunken evening where I messaged him and he said he’d come to visit me at uni. I was convinced I’d see a pig fly before I’d see him but alas he appeared and we were together for 16 years. Married, a house, holidays, living what seemed the dream; but we all know fairy tales don’t exist.


So mid 30s never having been single or gone anywhere near a dating app, I was released like a lamb to the slaughter. All my friends were married, mostly with kids and I was now back on the shelf. How was I ever going to survive?

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